Cumbersome Affair || Priya Sept 21, 2014 2:29:02 GMT -4
Post by Talon Pierce on Sept 21, 2014 2:29:02 GMT -4
He wasn't sure how long he sat there, pulling himself down into his own little trance, letting the darkness of the shadows, which now painted him into that corner, consume him. It was the one place he felt most at home, the one place that he felt as though he could be free of the worries and the stress that life often times brought upon him. It was the one place...he could hide. A common trend which had started when he was a young boy and he had first been picked on for being...different. If you could even call label what he had...what was wrong with him...as something so tame and benign.
No, he as a freak, pure and simple, and if he had any doubt on the matter the nightmares that plagued him were always a solid reminder to that fact. It was why he retreated into the shadows now rather than roll over and go back to sleep...and in truth, a part of him had wondered if perhaps leaving would not have been the best option. But...he had promised her that he would stay, and as hard as it had been do to so given his fierce need to protect her and to save her from the same fate his previous girlfriend had found...he just couldn't. Fucked up, he knew, especially considering he didn't even know if he could be so bold as to label her his girlfriend or not...but whatever this thing was between them, it was putting her in danger and yet he couldn't just walk away.
He had sat, for the first half hour or so, trying to decide what he should do and trying desperately to convince himself that leaving, regardless of the promise he had made, would be the best and safest option...for her. That was all that really mattered right? Priya....Stardust? She was the only one he could even fathom putting before himself...and yet, the more he sat there and the more he tried to convince himself...the more he realized that his eyes kept drifting upward, toward her as she lay there sleeping on that bed. The very bed where they had just had sex...Where he had surrendered to her and her to him and where something...whatever it might have been...had started between them.
No, that wasn't right. Whatever this thing was...it had started back at the airport, when his eyes had first landed upon her...and from that moment on, he had been hooked. Now, here he was, trying to convince himself to give it up, when he had had the chance before they ever took things this far. To walk away now....Well, it would not only make him look like a prick, but it would have hurt her, and not just in a typical, emotional and perhaps mental way. It would have forced her further into her shell...forced her to isolate herself further from the people around her.
Those were the reasons he continued to tell himself...but ultimately, he knew deep down that the truth was something far more selfish than that. He just couldn't walk away, because he couldn't stomach the thought of never seeing her smile again, or never having her soft, delicate hands touching his face. He couldn't imagine not being able to run his fingers through her silken locks and watch the way she fidgeted every so slightly when she felt out of place.
So, ultimately, all of his warring within himself had been for-not and with no small amount of guilt weighing down upon his heart, he had turned to the sketchbook in his hands to see the picture he had been mindlessly fiddling away with since he first sat down in that shadow filled corner. No real great amount of surprise coming to him as he noticed instantly what he had been drawing, a perfect image of the woman who now slept just feet away, wrapped up in that sheet with her dark hair a perfect mess around her beautiful face.
Even with all the weight he felt now, a weak smile would begin to work its way onto his lips as his thumb smoothed a few lines and smudged in some of the shading, adding the finishing touches to the drawing he had not even really thought about making. It was perfect, at least as far as he was concerned, and though he wouldn't bet on anyone else thinking that...he didn't care. It wasn't for the world...it was for him...for her.
As she began to shift, his eyes would look upward, and out of curiosity really, he would remain quiet as she began to wake. It was clear, when she first woke up and began to reach across the bed, that she thought him gone, and the Reaver couldn't help but shift uncomfortably at the way her features altered, just a tiny bit. She was disappointed. Sad even? He wasn't sure...but it was clear she thought he had lied to her, and for whatever reason, that broke his heart far more than it probably should have.
His lips parting, intent on telling her where he was so that she wouldn't have to feel that way...he was silenced as her eyes fell upon him and that look of relief washed over her. It was enough to bring that weak smile back to his lips for a moment before he straightened up as she began to move. Slowly, after a moment, he would rise up from the floor where he had been sitting, shaking his head softly as she apologized. She had no reason to be sorry, as he was aware of her sin and rather surprised, honestly, that she was awake now as it were. He had been prepared to sit there for a full day or so if he had to, however long it took her to get the rest that she or her sin required. Still, he wouldn't deny the happiness he felt at having her awake now and being able to touch her and talk to her once more.
"You don't have to be sorry. I would wait for you, no matter how long it took." He nodded, slowly pulling himself out of the corner and dropping the sketchpad onto the bed, his arm slipping around her waist as he pulled her petite frame against his own. Without another word, Talon leaned down and as his other hand slid into her hair, he would pull her head back just a bit so that his lips could find her own.
It wasn't an overly passionate kiss, nor was it rough or even sexual in nature. In fact, it was anything but sexual. It was, in a way, the best way that he knew how to open himself up to her...at least in a way that he wanted to do. He wasn't the world's greatest at telling people, even those closest to him, how he felt...he never had been...but that didn't mean he always wanted to be shut off...at least not with her. He wanted to try, and though he might not have known why...he just did. So, he kissed her, with longing and fear both warring for a spot at the pit of his stomach, causing his fingers to curl about her and hold her to him a little more tightly. There was a possession and a fear in his embrace that he couldn't mask, and though he wasn't trying to worry her, he still just couldn't help how he felt.
Breaking away from the kiss, his forehead resting softly against her own, he would sigh, his eyes closing momentarily as his thumb slowly caressed her cheek. "Stardust I..." He tried to explain, not wishing to freak her out...He tried to get the words out that were building up in his mind, battering against his usually calm and collected thoughts. But...he just couldn't get them out....
"I would love some curry. It sounds amazing. I haven't had real food in awhile." He spoke as he pulled away, giving her a somewhat nervous smile and pulling his hands away from her to allow her to move. Slowly, he tucked his hands into his pockets, lowering his gaze to the floor as he began the mental process of kicking himself in the ass for being such...such a...such a fucking coward.